Scared...

So, I do some art. As you all know. And I do some digital scrapbooking - again, you know this. I sometimes combine the two. I take hi-res pics of my journal pages before they're complete and then use them in photoshop as digital journaling pages. So for a few months now, the store owner at Ahhh Scrap (my first digiscrapping home!) has been asking me if I'd like to create digital art journaling stuff for the store. Of course, I like the IDEA of that. Being a designer, making something that people like, it sounds REALLY fun. However...I'm hesitant for the same reason I don't try to sell art work. Having all your friends tell you it's awesome and wonderful is one thing. Putting it out there for the general public to see and perhaps want but most likely NOT want - that's different. It's like saying "My work only have value if you not only LIKE it, but if you choose to PAY FOR IT." And then the little critic starts. Who the hell am I to think my digital stuff is good enough for someone to want?

ALL of that being said - I committed. I said I would make a mini digital journaling kit for Digital Scrapbooking Day (November 5). We (I hesitate to say "we" because I'm not really part of the design team...or am I?) have a color palette, everyone is to choose a color and make a mini kit. That means 3-5 papers and 5-7 embellishments. Mine is four papers and 6 embellishments - I like to be average. I'm excited about this kit. I LOVE it. It's really, really awesome. All of the embellishments are digital forms of things I've drawn or painted, the colors are great. It rocks. But what if I put it out there and no one ELSE thinks it rocks? What if it's only amazing in my head? Don't get me wrong - I don't think that someone not liking my work makes it LESS amazing...right now. You could hate all my work (why would you follow my blog if you did??) and it doesn't make it less valuable to me. But once it has a price tag on it, is that different? If I'm making things to sell them and no one wants to buy them, does it devalue them? I know I'm overthinking it - it's a free mini kit and most people who journal do NOT do so digitally. But this is how my brain works and my blog is a lot like a digital journal for me.

Here is a page I made with one of the papers and the alpha from the kit:

I'm calling it "Silhouettes and Shadows" or "Shadows and Silhouettes", I'm not sure which one. I've given the kit to two people, and it will be checked by someone who specializes in Quality Control. I'm terrified of failure AND of success. What the F is wrong with me?? Maybe I should journal about that!