The Mess!

I was talking to my friend Wendy today and I mentioned that I like to leave the back of my artwork MESSY. I know this is a no-no, you're supposed to pretty up the back of things, ESPECIALLY if the things are leaving your hands and going to someone else. But I don't wanna. It's the biggest thing that makes me hesitate to join "real" ATC swaps. A message was actually sent out to the Yahoo group that I'm in about it, making sure the back is nice and has all this info on it that I don't want to spend time writing. Once I'm done with a piece, I just want to fling it aside and work on something else. Wendy said it's like a tapestry - the front is bright and beautiful, and the back is dark and messy. She also said that life is the same way. She's right. Totally right. And I often spend a lot of time focusing on the mess instead of the beauty. Silly, right? Because the mess is necessary for the beautiful part to happen. With out the BACK of the tapestry, there is no FRONT.

Here is the back of an ATC that I'm sending to Wendy. Will she care about this mess? I don't think so. She will focus on the front, and on having a friend who made her a (tiny) piece of art. Here is what my painting desk looks like right now (yes, it's small, I put whatever piece I'm working on in my lap):
And here is what I painted today. I'm a lot more likely to show this to you. But why? Would you like me less because of my mess? People WANT to say "No, of course not, I would like you anyway!" but it's so rarely true. People want to see perfectly dressed, washed, polished OTHER people. I don't know why that is. I'd much rather see the tattooed, blue-haired people with paint on their hands.
The other day I was painting and I found myself TOTALLY amused by the fact that I had paint on both hands, all over my pants, and one of my feet. I was like "I'm totally blogging this!" because it was really funny in my head. But every time I look at the picture I took, I decide not to post it. It's not what people want to see. The just want to see the painting. The pretty side, not the back. It's taken me 30 years to figure out that this is the reason why I have so few friends, so few people who want to spend time with me. I'm too low-maintenance. No need to vacuum before I come over, I'm not going to notice the crumbs. But by the same token, when I wash my hands after I pee, I'm just trying to get the germs off - I don't even notice the paint. Right now my hands smell like a lovely combination of Tilex and Clorox Anywhere spray but there is teal paint on one thumbnail and pink paint on the other. My hoodie is at LEAST eight years old, and it and my pants are both streaked with paint (and soggy Oreo - a little piece broke off after I dunked it in my coffee and I wiped it and it squished...). I know the people reading this are going to immediately think (and type) things like "Oh, I would totally be friends with you! I wouldn't care about the paint on your hands/shirt, etc." But it's really VERY seldom to find someone who doesn't NOTICE. Who just looks at me and sees ME - not my outfit, not my shoes, not the paint. Just Goog, plain and simple. I don't know how to learn to care about the paint on my hands.

On a sillier note (sorry, didn't mean to get onto my soapbox there) - I took this picture of the screen of my iPhone WITH my iPhone. For reals. WHAT is the purpose of this feature? For reals, people. What the F? A picture of my phone taken WITH my phone.
PS If you find this fascinating and HAVE to know how to do it, just press the home button and the power button at the same time. I don't know why it's useful, but hubby claims to do it all the time.