Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Maybe I shouldn't say that, she probably wouldn't appreciate me comparing my pages to hers! But at the same time, I'm mimicking her style so it doesn't seem right not to say that and pretend it's my own.
I know, I know - they're both pink AND the last one was pink, too. (The crazy bird thing.) The reason for that is because this is my Paper Research Project journal, all five paper types have to be treated the same. Even the same paint COLOR? I mean, Golden makes lots of pretty colors...
That is true, but if I used a different color, it would be harder to tell how the different papers take the paint. So five papers means five pink pages (magenta, actually). I really, really enjoy journaling like this. Now I'm trying to decide if I should do a WHOLE journal like this, or just a few pages in my everyday journal. I like a page being prepped and ready when I just want to blabber. (Like this morning.) But there are lots of times I want to draw. Have a different journal for drawing? Or combine? I think combine. Eventually I just want to have ONE journal that's for EVERYTHING - the cartoons, paint, drawing, all of it. Can I do that? Dunno. Maybe. We'll see.
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Friday, February 25, 2011
They're cute, I like them well enough. But - shouldn't there be more? More what, I don't know, but more something.
I painted, I stamped, I inked and I like them. But I'm not completely satisfied, you know? They're finished, but if I was going to do them over I'd add something. Maybe drips or splatters. Both, even. I'm pretty good and making things that are pretty good. I want to take things over the top. Gotta work on that.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
But I liked this particular one so much I made it into a painting! I can't even TELL you how much fun this was. Amazing amounts of fun. You gotta try it!!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
It's so very shimmery in real life...and the white looks less like bird poop.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
I couldn't handle being "the best" anything - all the other clarinet players already hated me because I was straight out of high school and sitting second chair, playing first part, in a space where they felt they rightfully belonged. Maybe they were right. Who was I to argue?
This is directly opposite of my nature when it comes to something factual. I had a woman argue with me about my astrological sign once. I told her I was a Leo, she asked when my birthday was, I told her, she said she thought I was something else, I looked at her like she was insane and told her I was positive I'm a Leo. Then she was like "Wow, you sure are insistent about it!" Was I? Maybe I was - because I KNEW I wasn't wrong.
But things like art, music, writing - it's subjective. Some people will like it, some won't. It's so weird to see what will change someone's mind. My husband has NO opinions of his own. He's the MOST wishy-washy person you will ever meet. He can't even decide where to pick up dinner from. He'll think something is awesome until I tell him why I don't like it - then the next time he talks about it, he hates it. If I go to the movies with someone and the entire theater laughs at a joke I don't get, I'll poke the person I'm with and say "I don't get it." More often than not they say "Yeah, me neither," but they were laughing - why would you do that? You're faking a reaction for strangers in a dark room?
That's the kind of thing that makes me overly critical and judgmental to myself. If you'll pretend to get a joke so a bunch of people you'll never see again don't notice you're not laughing at something THEY probably don't get either, why would I believe you when you say you like something I did? Even here, when I get a nice comment from someone out in cyberspace my initial reaction is "Oh, I gotta take it down. What if someone else sees it and they like it, too?" It's so much easier to be a college dropout stay-at-home mom than an aspiring clarinet player whose teacher fed her what she wanted to hear. (He flunked me, by the way.) It's so much easier and less frightening to hide in the shadows. I'm not afraid of failure, not even a tiny bit - what am I going to fail at? I'm terrified - shaking in my boots terrified, want to hide in the closet terrified - of success. So I paint and I show my friends pictures of a painting here and there. I play my clarinet in the University band that my friend conducts. And my paintings gather dust in a stack on the floor, my clarinet spends most of its time silent in its case. How long did it take me to realize I was horribly, unspeakably, irrationally terrified of succeeding? About thirty years. You?
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Yeah, not so much. I know the following pics are kind of crappy, I had to take them with my phone, too close for comfort so you could see the color comparisons. The copic marker color chart was given to me by a copic supplier, so it's not even like I printed it at home on crappy paper.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
OK, I'm all caught up with the drawing part - not so much with the coloring!! I know, I know - Man up, Goog! I'm just so scared of my copic markers!! I gotta get over it and I will...maybe tomorrow.